The first two counseling sessions have been great. I have found myself really looking forward to them and what I will learn. After doing a lot of reflecting I have noticed in other people why they act the way they do. However it is always someone else who notices it in me. Sometimes it brings me to tears thinking how come I don't notice it within myself? Why is it that other people do? I don't have the answer to that. However, I am blessed to have others in my life who can tell me what I look like and I am acting like. I am all over the place at times and sometimes need someone to help me stay focused and on track.
This weekend was a great way as so was last week. We celebrated two amazing birthdays My sister Hannah's 18 and My Brother Jakob's 7th. I am so proud of the people they are becoming. I love them to pieces and it was amazing to celebrate with them. I hope they felt very special.
Before the party I was upset that some of my family wasn't going to be there. However, I am learning from others how to help myself from getting so upset. Since I pretty much know if they are coming or not. So to prepare I am not counting on them at all. Then if they show up great and if not, Oh well they missed out. This will be the best way for now. The party was fun was suppose to be from 12 to 230 but at 7 we still had people in our home playing, laughing and helping. It was a great day!
Now as I write this I have 3 of my favorite kids in my house watching a movie eating popcorn. I'm very proud of them.As much as I want them to stay little. I can't wait to see the person they turn into with love and guidance.
I have to say that I feel like I am getting stronger and realizing what I need to do to help me. In helping me I have seen how I can and have helped others. Its very important to me to teach a better way of life to everyone around me including kids. I have started to read the bible and pray with my siblings at night.